A Man's Gotta Have A Code."

“Man’s Gotta Have A Code.”

-Omar Little; The Wire

What’s your Code?

I don’t mean your alarm code or the code to your garage. Nor am I talking about some platitudes you toss off, or some feel good fortune cookie answer.

I’m talking about a philosophy and the strict code of rules by which you live your life, and by which you raise your family?

Don’t have one?

Why not?

How would your life be different if you did?

Today’s TV Life Lesson comes courtesy of Omar Little in The Wire who always said:

“A Man’s Gotta Have A Code.”

A "Code of Life" usually refers to a set of rules or principles by which someone chooses to live. Some examples include:

1. The Golden Rule: A principle of treating others as oneself would wish to be treated. It is a maxim that is found in many religions and cultures.

2. Chivalry: The code of conduct for knights during the Middle Ages, emphasizing virtues such as bravery, courtesy, honor, and gallantry toward women.

3. Bushido: The code of the Samurai in feudal Japan, emphasizing virtues like loyalty, self-discipline, and respectful, ethical behavior.

4. Stoicism: A school of Hellenistic philosophy that teaches the development of self-control and fortitude to overcome destructive emotions.

But back to Omar Little….

There is a great scene in The Wire where stick up man and general Baltimore hood bad ass, Omar Little goes out for a morning stroll to get some cereal. There he is striding through Baltimore’s skid row and back alleys in his turquoise blue silk pajamas. It’s quite the scene. He stops at a bodega. Gets the cereal and some smokes, then heads back home, stopping a couple of blocks away to light up a cig. He leans against a brick wall and takes a drag. Suddenly, a garbage bag drops down from a window above and lands at Omar’s feet.

Now, to watchers of The Wire, as well as to Omar Little, this is a familiar scene. Though usually Omar’s attire is different. Trench coat and shotgun in the place of silk pajamas and boxed cereal.

Omar looks inside the plastic garbage bag and sure enough there are drugs inside. Turns out Omar, Baltimore’s Robin Hood (he literally robs the dealers in the hood) had unknowingly stopped to have his smoke against a drug stash house. The dealers inside the stash house, misinterpreting Omar’s smoke break for a robbery, simply gave up the shit and tossed him the drugs.

Despite his surprise, Omar picks up the bag and takes it home along with his groceries. When his lover sees the bag of drugs and asks, “what’s this?” Omar explains. His lover is bemused at the good fortune coincidence has sought to deliver to their breakfasts table. Omar, however, looks annoyed. He turns to his lover and says, “It ain’t what you take, it’s who you taken it from. How you expect to run with the wolves come night when you spend all day sparring with the puppies.”

Getting the drugs this way violates Omar’s code, his sense of honor.

So what exactly is Omar Little’s Code.

Another scene in The Wire sees Omar explaining it to homicide detective, Bunk Mooreland, (Wendell Pierce). He explains his code:

1. "Never put my gun on no citizen": This rule means Omar only uses his gun on those involved in the drug trade. He doesn't threaten or harm civilians or "average citizens". In daily life, this rule can be interpreted as not causing harm to innocents or people who aren't part of your 'battles'.

2. "A Man Gotta Have A Code": Omar's line here sums up his belief that everyone should have a set of principles they stick to, regardless of their circumstances. He respects those who adhere to their own code, even if it's different from his. This can apply to us in everyday life as the idea that we should all strive to have a personal moral or ethical code that guides our decisions and actions. Consistency and reliability in our actions can help establish trust and respect with others.

3. Church Sunday. Omar even believes in the code of the Sunday truce. That on a “Church Sunday” (the Lord’s Day), the game is paused. As he believes…“Nobody in the city is that lowdown to disrespect a Sunday morning.

Until someone does. Which begs the question, when you live by a Code how do you deal when people don’t live according to theirs?

When Bunk refuses to honor a commitment made by a district attorney to Omar telling him that if he didn’t do this crime, he did plenty of others. Interestingly, Bunk references “The Golden Rule” — a biblical code originally from the Torah in Leviticus 19:18 and later expounded on and popularized as one of Jesus’s teachings in the Gospels of Luke 6:31 and Matthew 7:12.

Omar, in turn, reminds Bunk of his Code To Uphold The Law by reminding him that if Bunk lets Omar take the fall for a murder he didn’t commit, he is letting a killer get away with it.

Although Omar's code is specific to his dangerous and violent lifestyle, its underlying principles can be relevant in other contexts:

• Principle of Non-harm: Like Omar's refusal to harm innocent citizens, we can ensure our actions or decisions do not harm innocent or unrelated parties.

• Respect for Personal Ethics: Like Omar's insistence on having a code, we can develop and maintain our own personal code of ethics, ensuring our actions align with our beliefs and values.

• Respect for Others' Ethics: Omar respects others who stick to their codes, even when they conflict with his. This can translate into respecting diversity of thought and ethical beliefs in others.

Who are some other characters who live by codes? How can they serve as examples for us?

Movies:

◦ "Unforgiven" (1992): Clint Eastwood's character is a retired outlaw living by his new code of non-violence, only to be drawn back into the world he left.

◦ "Batman”: Bruce Wayne lives by a strict code to not kill, inspired by his childhood trauma seeing his parents murdered.

◦ “Heat”: Neal McCullough, the thief played by DeNiro lives by the code of thieves: “Do not have anything in your life you are not prepared to walk out on in thirty seconds if you spot the heat around the corner.”

◦ In “About A Boy” Hugh Grant lives by a code of 30 second blocks. He won’t commit to anything in his life that requires more than a 30-second block of time.

(Needless to say not all codes are created equal.)

TV Shows:

◦ Tony Soprano ("The Sopranos"): Tony Soprano, a mob boss, navigates a complex and often paradoxical code. On one hand, he has to adhere to the code of the mafia, which involves loyalty to the family (both biological and criminal), a commitment to omertà (the code of silence), and a willingness to use violence. On the other hand, Tony frequently breaks this code by putting his personal interests first. At the same time, he has a code for his immediate family where he tries to be a good father and husband, showing his conflicting dual roles. Tony Soprano worries from the start of the show that the way of life all his predecessors lived by is fading a way. The very first episode talks about his concern that all the connected men in his world are selling out. Turning Hollywood. Telling their secrets to be turned into movies and tv shows. He is greatly upset about this because his world is changing in ways that will make it harder to live by his code.

◦ Vic Mackey ("The Shield"): Vic Mackey is an anti-hero who bends and often breaks the law to achieve what he sees as a greater good, which includes protecting his team and cleaning up the streets. He believes in a version of justice where the ends justify the means. His code, therefore, involves a sense of loyalty, protection of his 'family' (his team), and a utilitarian approach where he's willing to commit lesser evils to prevent (in his view) greater ones.

◦ Raylan Givens ("Justified"): Raylan Givens, a U.S. Marshal, operates under the banner of law and order, but his method of upholding the law often skirts legal boundaries. His code involves a mix of Old West justice (as embodied by his quick-draw approach to dealing with criminals) and a deep-seated commitment to protecting the innocent. He tends to clash with his superiors due to his unorthodox methods and willingness to resort to violence when he deems it necessary, yet his ultimate aim is always to uphold justice.

◦ Dexter Morgan (“Dexter”): The titular character is a serial killer who lives by a code taught by his adoptive father, only killing other killers.

◦ The Mandalorian: The protagonist is a bounty hunter who lives by the Mandalorian code.

"Game of Thrones," with its sprawling and diverse cast of characters, showcases a variety of personal codes.

1. Eddard Stark (Ned): Ned's code revolves around duty and honor. He is steadfast in his loyalty to his friends, family, and the realm. One specific rule he follows is that "the man who passes the sentence should swing the sword," highlighting his belief in taking personal responsibility for his actions.

2. Jaime Lannister: Despite his early portrayal as a villain, Jaime adheres to a code of his own. His transformation in the series involves wrestling with his conflicting duties to his family, to the king, and to his own sense of what's right. His famous moniker "Kingslayer" represents a violation of the knight's code to protect the king, but Jaime did it to save countless lives from the Mad King's plan to burn King’s Landing.

3. Daenerys Targaryen: Daenerys operates by a code of justice and mercy, striving to be a benevolent ruler. She often intervenes to protect the vulnerable and seeks to abolish slavery in societies where it's deeply ingrained. The end of the series sees her violate her own code when she lays waste to King’s Landing in much the same way her grandfather, the Mad King, ultimately attempted to do.

4. Jon Snow: Like his father Ned, Jon Snow's code is centered around honor, duty, and loyalty. Even as he faces moral dilemmas, he strives to do what he believes is right for the people he protects.

5. Tyrion Lannister: Tyrion's code is more pragmatic. He values intelligence and diplomacy over brute force and often seeks peaceful, rational solutions to problems. He believes in paying his debts—a literal and figurative creed of House Lannister. Tyrion likes living and is willing to use any means at his disposal to ensure that he can live how he wants without interference from other people.

6. The Night's Watch: The men of the Night's Watch live by a strict code, vowing to hold no lands, father no children, and take no wife, dedicating their lives to the defense of the realms of men.

7. Arya Stark: Arya lives by a code of vengeance against those who have harmed her family and friends. Her "list" of names represents this code.

8. Davos Seaworth, who becomes known as the Onion Knight, comes to mind. A landed knight, and a former smuggler who was in the service of Stannis Baratheon as Hand of the King. After Stannis's defeat and death at Winterfell, Davos remains at Castle Black, where he becomes one of Jon Snow’s principal advisor and right-hand man. He later sits on the Small Council of Brandon Stark as Master of Ships.

In GOT when someone acts bravely, nobly, they are given a title, some lands, and a family crest.

Personally, I’d like to see family crests come back. It makes us think about the values we hold dear for our families. And how we want the world to think of us.

• What would you put on yours?

• What principles do you live by?

• What beliefs would you be willing to die for?

Why Most People Don't Live Their Lives According to a Code

Living life according to a specific code is a conscious choice, and it requires continuous effort, discipline, and dedication. In contrast, most people are not taught to live by a strict code, or they may find such a life too restrictive.

The complexities of the modern world also mean that rigid codes can sometimes seem outdated or impractical. Societal pressure, the drive for individualism, and the nuanced realities of ethical dilemmas can make adhering to a specific code challenging. Furthermore, people often prefer the flexibility to adapt and evolve their beliefs and behaviors over time, rather than adhering strictly to a predetermined set of rules.

People today make the case they often have a more fluid and personal set of ethics or beliefs that guide their actions, which can shift and develop throughout their lives. This allows for greater adaptability and personal growth, albeit with less consistency than living by a strict code might provide.

Paradoxically, it is worth noting that we do seem to live in an era of endless virtue signaling. This is often performed by people who have done little or nothing to earn the virtue they claim but still desire the unearned respect. I’m sure the lack of the former (codes) and the proliferation of the latter (virtue signaling) are connected.

There’s a line in “LA Confidential” that I always think of when I see people publicly virtue signaling. “Sgt Jack Vincennes” (Kevin Spacey) is told by his police Captain, “don’t start trying to do the right thing now, Boyo. You haven’t got the practice.”

I think that, despite what we tell ourselves, we are like “Jack Vincennes” in LA Confidential. We want to do the right things, live a decent and good life that is rewarding to us, but the truth is we don’t have the practice.

Sure, different people find fulfillment and moral guidance in different ways, and what works for one individual may not work for another. Choosing to live by a specific code often entails a high level of personal commitment, discipline, and moral courage, and it can can indeed lead to a more content, fulfilled, and morally consistent life, as well as contribute to a strong sense of identity and self-respect giving meaning and purpose to our lives.

Even if living by a code isn’t your jam, think about how different the world would be if more of us did live our lives according to an ethical, honorable, Code.

• If you were going to do that what would be the principles of your Code you would live by?

• How would you represent them on a family crest?

Here endeth the lesson.